Chapter 6

Hep, Scroat and now Jim continued North towards Portland. They stopped for lunch at a tiny diner.

"Jim, can you stay invisible?" Hep asked.

"Sure, why?"

"Well, unless you're planning to eat, I don't think the waitress really needs to know you're with us. It might make things weird." Hep said.

"Oh, right." Jim faded.

"That's a good trick Jim. You gotta teach me how to do that sometime," Scroat said.

"I'll see what I can do," Jim muttered.

Hep pulled open the door to the diner and they went in. Hep was pleased to see that they had an honest-to-goodness counter to sit at.

Jim did a pretty good job of staying invisible, although he couldn't help but comment on how good the food smelled when the waitress brought it out.

"Sorry, my buddy here is working on his ventriloquism," Hep said when the waitress gave him a funny look.

"That's right!" Scroat said. "I'm gonna be a star, baby!"

The waitress rolled her eyes and walked off.

"Keep it down, shithead." Scroat said to Jim.

"Sorry. I haven't gotten out much lately." Jim stayed silent for the rest of the meal.

Scroat and Hep were also silent for the rest of their meal. Hep thought about Tommy's visit. It was weird that he'd just showed up; he hadn't seen or heard from Tommy for almost 60 years.

Hep last saw Tommy trying to pick up a waitress in a bar in New Mexico after a disastrous run in with a couple of locals in a nearby town. Hep was along working as Tommy's "driver," even though they both knew he was really there as a heavy - someone to solve problems that couldn't be solved by smooth talk.

"Gentleman, I have a business proposition that you're going to love," Tommy told them. "I'll sell you a supply of cleaning chemicals, and marketing materials. Enough that you can go out and start distributing them to other people who want to go into business for themselves. You can't lose! It's just like being the folks who sold mining tools to prospectors during the gold rush; you're going to make money no matter what."

"How much is all this going to cost?" one of the local men asked Tommy.

"For you, almost free." Tommy grinned and got into some of the finer details of his pitch.

Eventually, they paid him, and Tommy promised delivery of the products. Of course, he never actually delivered on his promise, and didn't leave town quickly enough to get away before they caught on. Hep and Tommy managed to get away from the angry locals and their friends, and blew town immediately. After they stopped for a drink in a neighboring town, Hep decided it was time to go his own way.
***
While Hep was lost in thought, Scroat was busy wondering if he was ever going to get a refill on his coffee.

They finished up, paid the check, left a crummy tip and left. Once they were by the bikes, Jim slowly became visible again.

"You wouldn't believe how much work it is staying invisible. I mean, it's not that bad when you're off by yourself in the middle of a forest, but when you're really trying to avoid being seen..."

Scroat cut him off "Man, don't give us any of that ninja bullshit. You couldn't have been working too hard at it, because you sure didn't have any problem talking. Even though you weren't supposed to be there. And things that aren't there don't fucking talk."

Jim quietly drifted into Hep's sidecar and sat down. He worried that he might lose his ride, and this was the furthest he'd managed to get from the woods since he'd died.

"Are you just gonna take that garbage from him?" Hep asked Jim.

Jim looked at Hep, mildly shocked.

"He's just talking shit. If I were you, I'd hit him upside the head with a hammer. It's ok, he's got a damn hard head. And there's nothing but shit in there anyway. At least, that's what I gather from how he talks." Hep said.

"So you're not mad?"

"Fuck no, you backwoods, shit-kickin' apparition." Scroat chimed in. "I wish you would have kept talking once you had her attention. We already had our food, there was nothing to lose at that point. Shit, we probably would have gotten lunch for free."

"Let's go." Hep said. They started up the bikes again and pointed them North.